Fats, Vitamins and Minerals

Two kings and a Jack in my reading for today, which should be good overall, but a strange spread. And no water, all air and fire. My ex-partner comes home today, yes, the Philippines is now home to him. My country is really beautiful, but often so easy to take for granted. It is quite true that we take relationships for granted too - the other person is like the air we breathe, we hardly know it’s there until it disappears. My ex-partner loves me but he took me for granted, and I tried too hard not to express the pain that caused until the very last moment.

I must promise to look after myself this year, and continue on. Towards the fire, I called it. Yes, why do I keep doing things for others? Even as a child I have offten allowed others take credit for what I do, take what could be for me, enjoy what is mine. And then when there was nothing else that could be done for myself or enjoyed by myself, I started doing things for others. Perhaps I should’ve become a nun or a hermit!

Anyway, something in the email inbox reminded me of what could be my “new year’s resolution” - to stop slaving away for others.

But because I grew up not really having or enjoying much of anything, I don’t know what I want or want to do for myself anymore. But it is not impossible to know.

The first simple step was to replace the banner in my Projects site with my own personal banner. A reminder that this is my Projects site and not other peoples’, a reminder that I am responsble for creating, developing and keeping it.

The next steps … I don’t know.

A friend and colleague is going on a retreat this week - perhaps I badly need one too!

EMail This Post This entry was posted by Fats on Friday, January 5th, 2007 at 6:09 am and is filed under Fats, Vitamins & Minerals > Wika at Hirap. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.